UFO Sightings 2009 Orb Triangle

UFO shapes in the air, buzzing around a giant space telescope operated by tiny men. Wavy hand camera operation cannot ruin the fact that this is a brilliant film of over-excited alien bees.

Kington eX Factor finalist duet details leaked

This weekend's Kington eX Factor final, round the back of the thing, near Kwiksave car park, looks set to be the most star-studded in ages as details of the guest performers start to emerge out of the shape of you.

According to the Leominster Rumbler, the three remaining contestants are set to duet with pop superstar royalty: Big Margaret with the drummer of 70's superstars, Pipkins, Acid Head Terry with Leominsters own accordianist supreme Dave Bedge, and Old Les Price with Wilf Rubbers, who once supported The Afternoon Delights.

Former Beatle Sir Paul McCartney is not expected to make a solo performance during the show, council sources revealed.

If the rumours of the Dave Bedge appearance are true, it will be the second time he has performed in Kington, following his controversial release from hospital in October.

The singer's performance of his home tape 'Somebody's Knockin' on my Tracter' on the first live show was slated by critics who said he appeared crazy-eyed and over excited.

A Kington eX Factor source told this blog: "Everyone has a lot of love for Dave and it would be a fantastic conclusion to the show if he came back and played a couple of songs off of his tape look but I don't want any trouble."

'Abba Hair' by them Mind Flight

'Abba Hair' by them Mind Flight boys, from their forthcoming CD 'Broken', an introspective sequence concerning slow lorries to Cardiff, Gerald, and the inexplicable consequences of brandishing your levers.

Gong live in Bristol, Nov 2009

Me and some of the other old boys (including Big Margaret) went down to Bristol in Dennis Nixons minibus to watch our old favourites Gong. They had that young lad Hillage playing guitar with them, and I can tell you it was a real treat.

Unfortunately we missed the Hillage Band support due to the distractions of some very fine draught Addlestones brew-fest at a pub en-route (bit of French lingo there lol) but got there in time to watch the Gong boys braodcasting sausage gas and psychedelic alignments directly into our mind curatains, with Daevids magic stick transmissions projecting Planet Gong geometric excitement into the shape of you.

Blakey - a painted portrait

I done some painting the other day, so thought I'd share him with yous. It's a picture of Blakey, who ran after buses and considered advanced mathmatical equations in the seventies.

Much of his theory of lever gases and bus alignment had its origins in the work of Boltzmann in statistical mechanics problems where time and space distribution averages are equal. Steintithaus gives a practical application to 'Dannys Brew Frenzy Theorem' to keeping one foot on the side of the thing, and the other slightly awkwardly crooked around the back with the other arm pressed against the ledge whilst simultaneously balancing your cans on her.

The mathematical origins of conductivity and bus alignment are due to von don Gary Neumann, Baker, and Presley in the 1930s. It has since grown to be a huge thing on a plinth and has applications not only to statistical mechanics, but also to curtain theory, mind geometry, Drummond's analysis of it, and the shape of you. There are also many internal problems (e.g., tractor theorems being applied to giant women) which are interesting if you can be bothered.

Make your own crop circle

Make your own UFO corn dolly using magnetic alignments, some left over levers and some old juice from the Kington chip oil.

The spiritually dynamic local farmer

Liquid Len sent in this, which he said he "read in a bok":

When coming closer via Leominster and the A44 locals can take two spiritual paths:

He either learns the path by walking around like a donkey, bumping into telleys and UFO's, and discovering the path through stench recognition, or he learns to develop his overused brewery senses to learn the path properly like. The latter process of developing one’s senses is called the “oop-la fahilingar o'er theer” or the “Bill Drummond Brew”, mastered without pain and without resorting to getting excited, but through leaves. To do this you need to duck under a wooden barrier, or curtain with your cans, angle your leg behind the thing. In this awkward and slightly painful position, slide your right leg between the doorshank, and squeeze the top of your face under a second, perpendicular stick, partially jamming your right shoulder into the shape of you.

The spiritually dynamic local farmer discovers that some things located on a plinth are truly resonances that we attract to help us expand and find behind the curtain what we have lost, up by Market Hill, about 5 o'clock last saturday.

By embracing his stick, the individuals shape is rendered like that of a barn, or protractor, or heavy drinker, to ascend in consciousness, and journey through the chip of life in a tiny glass horse called Peter. Truly, we can embrace our wobbly hands from “within” as there is no longer a reason to continue to learn through council depot training seminars can't come in boys you causin trouble

UFO shapes part 2 - 'The Trains'

This is taken from a book I found in Kington library look, 'UFO Shapes' by Dan Baker.

"UFO train" moving slowly with you.

Hello. I look at the sky alot, am an amateur horse. This report is of a vision I have seen in my mind, like a form of gas. My pop was losing a Wii Tennis game very badly, so I walked away from the house into a field a few mile away, near the skinheads, and was looking at the top of the trees (just behind the old warehouse..you can see the trees if you stand on a a small plinth and crane your neck lightly).

The 'ship' came from my left, roughly south-left and headed roughly north-right. The best way to describe what I was thinking about was as a "train". This train, or ship, or UFO was 3000 yards long and 3000 feet wide and aligned towards enjoyment. It was hoevering over the field not hoovering HAHA 2 feet above them and sounded like you. The noise was a rhythmic pumping pump pump. There were multiple sections like the carriages of a train, and they contained tiny people looking out at me frightened by it, and it had wheels made of real metal. It was moving rather slowly, perhaps 50 mph, but once it cleared the corner it speeded up a bit. I have never seen anything else like this despite living near Leominster for hunnert year.

Four Poster Stone Circle near Old Radnor in Powys

Rubber Henry found this one on the internet: some old boy's filmed the shape of the Radnor four stones. Bit of wind on there, and the camera boy doesn't say much but you can see all the alignments and there's a possible ufo near the end heh.

We're going there for Halloween I'm not excited for some orb investigations. I'll post the thing on him if I can remember/calm down.

Singing and dancing on Glastonbury Tor

I like this one, some old boys singling and tapping their bongos on Glastonbury Tor look. It's a good song, 'taking power, down the dragons line'. I don't know what this means but it reminds me of the boys up on Hergest on a full moon. We have some games up there I can tell you. Mostly old falmers up there aligning the Grids of Norris but it's nothing to do with the council.

This film goes a bit funny near the end, a dog starts barking, then the cameraman gets bored and starts talking to his mate, then films the boys behind him, so it all goes into a bit of a oo-loop-p, but still a cracking bit of filming and worthy of our things I wish that bloody dog would shu

Faust live at Amersham Arms in London.

Posted here for no other reason than they're one of the greatest bands on the planet. And not a tractor in sight.

"A Man Must Love A Thing Very Much If He Not Only Practices It Without Any Hope Of Fame And Money, But Even Practices It Without Any Hope Of Doing Well." -G. K. Chesterton

Metatron's Cube

I'm going to post one that I like now look, none of this funny shopping lists and getting excited (I'm not). This is my idea of heaven - some lovely shapes for your eyeyes, bit of sacred geometry and some soothing calm/don't get excited music for your ears. Crank the volume up to three.

I like the way all the alignments of the shapes fit perfectly onto that tablecloth, more or less, without the need for television presenters, horses or Drummonds Bees. I'll do the glass plinth/danny baker stuff another time look.

Alien or Ghost? you decide!

Here's one from....h-h.....Hairy Harry. Apparently this was filmed near his barn in Kington. The bloke in front of him is old Bill Wiggins from the chip oil. That's what he says anyways, I've just looked at the thing though and it doesn't say that so I'm getting a bit excited with h..h...h..hh..Harry. Look, please could anyone sending me things make sure you've written the right thing. Don't make it up look, or stick your shopping list reminder poem on him instead. I'll write something about golden plinths tomorrow.

Creepy Aliens on Top of Building in Mexico

Big Margaret sent me thissun. Creepy Aliens on Top of Building in Mexico. In her covering email she goes on to say:

Never go to him store without my list. And never go for "just one can" if you can haha possibly avoid them. The reasons are manifold: without a list, you are at the mercy of the store's giant rubber tubes that follow your mind and your own memory tin. You're liable to buy the whole farm by the time you get back to your car, or barn. It's a similar problem with going to the store for "just one can". You may be tempted to "impulse buy another can, or cans". Don't! Just Say 'flohingaliayadr' to busting your levers. Prepare your face carefully, research your new alignments, make a list and stick it on your thing.

I'm not quite sure how this relates to the video, maybe it was a MISTAKE but I've put him on there just in case look.

UFO Pie Recipe

Ingredients

1 ruler's worth of chocolate chips sh
1 thing of chopped rubber
2 UFO's, beaten
2 gasses
1 magic stick, melted and cooled by I'm not excited
1/2 c. Graham Norton
1 tsp. Bill Drummond

Directions

1. Mix chocolate chips and donkey, add a couple of UFO's, then butter up the mrs.
2. Add Graham Norton drainage, tv presenters and plenty of lols.
3. Pour into unbaked pie and stare intently for 30 minutes or until it gets nervous.
4. Test with einstein nose cone and administer The Stench.
5. Bake longer if necessary - it should be chewy, not like a runny poo.
6. This makes one 9 inch bill drummond.